2007-05-07 - 11:47 p.m.
Still tired from my friends' wedding yesterday. Outside ceremony and the weather was good. First Jewish wedding I'd ever been to, and Dave broke the glass just fine and all that. After that, since Dave is half Thai, his mom had set up a traditional blessing thing where family and friends dropped water on bride and groom's hands. We drank champagne and later there was food and dancing and smoking on the balcony. My girlfriend danced and she said "We're dancing!"
My college girlfriend was there, too, and she had on big sunglasses and her hair was much longer and she'd made it very wavy. I hugged her and said it was good to see her. But, man, it's funny how seeing someone will set you straight on how the picture you have in your head is, in fact, wrong. Because I'd forgotten how she could be noncommittal or standoffish or whatever it is. When I asked her if she were coming back to Dave and Julie's after the wedding, for the after-party, it didn't surprise me when she said she wasn't. And maybe she had a long drive back to New York and maybe that was it. But I'd forgotten how, when we were together, she let me sleep in her bed maybe two or three times the whole year and a half we were together. At the time, she said she couldn't sleep with somebody else there and I was generally OK with that. After a while, I remember we fell into a routine, where I'd come over to her apartment off of Wilkens Avenue, have dinner, this and that when we felt like it, and then leave when she got tired. I'd forgotten all that. Actually, hadn't forgotten it totally, but it's true that I usually seem to push that one farther back in favor of the nostalgia: the laughing, the smokes on her front porch, the little day trips we'd take in my Jetta with the sunroof you had to crank by hand. And, so, maybe not a letting go, but at least a realignment. I think that's probably for the best. Healthy, maybe.
Old friends, and good ones. More of us wear glasses now. More of us have fancy-pants degrees now. We still get drunk. We all still talk about music. Lots of them still get pretty high. So, is it that while we don't change, how we look at the world does? That could be right. That could be good.
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